


can't wait to be you

by andromedagalaxy



Series: Philkas College Verse [57]
Category: Eyewitness (US TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-13
Updated: 2018-03-13
Packaged: 2019-03-31 01:05:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13964028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/andromedagalaxy/pseuds/andromedagalaxy
Summary: Central Park always feels like a different city in and of itself, and they set up the art exhibit in the middle of Sheep Meadow. Only four other kids got picked for this—Philip said that ten kids aced it but Mr. Wood’s park permit wouldn’t allow that many, but he still got picked to go. Mr. Woods is here and he seems like an exciting sort of guy, really amped to be doing something like this, and he’s exactly the kind of artsy teacher Lukas always pictured when he thought about college.Mr. Woods blew up Philip’s five main photos and a few of the smaller ones are on their own canvas, and they set them up on easels with little descriptions on the corners. Lukas steps back and admires the set-up, how nice it all looks.“People are already watching,” Philip says, once everybody is ready and standing by their work. He grabs Lukas’s elbow and seems nervous, twisting in on himself, trying to make himself smaller.“Good,” Lukas says, kissing Philip’s temple. “Your photos deserve to be seen. Even though they’re all me looking like an idiot.”





	can't wait to be you

Lukas always finds himself watching Philip, and today is no exception. In fact, he’s watching him more, to the point where he feels like he’s goddamn stalking his own husband. 

_Husband._

He says that word over and over under his breath, hushed, like he’s in church or in school, uttering a tentative spell or untested poetry. _Husband, husband, husband._ It isn’t strange because he’s married to a man, it’s strange because it’s a happy ending. One he never thought he’d have for himself. And every time he looks at Philip it feels like the sky opens up and he’s finally able to see the brightness again.

Central Park always feels like a different city in and of itself, and they set up the art exhibit in the middle of Sheep Meadow. Only four other kids got picked for this—Philip said that ten kids aced it but Mr. Wood’s park permit wouldn’t allow that many, but he still got picked to go. Mr. Woods is here and he seems like an exciting sort of guy, really amped to be doing something like this, and he’s exactly the kind of artsy teacher Lukas always pictured when he thought about college. 

Mr. Woods blew up Philip’s five main photos and a few of the smaller ones are on their own canvas, and they set them up on easels with little descriptions on the corners. Lukas steps back and admires the set-up, how nice it all looks.

“People are already watching,” Philip says, once everybody is ready and standing by their work. He grabs Lukas’s elbow and seems nervous, twisting in on himself, trying to make himself smaller.

“Good,” Lukas says, kissing Philip’s temple. “Your photos deserve to be seen. Even though they’re all me looking like an idiot.”

Philip snorts. “You looking like a fucking model, we agreed on this.”

The pictures do look professional. Like something he’d see in a magazine or something, and sometimes when Lukas looks at them he’s a little freaked out that he’s actually looking at himself, and he’s a little more freaked out that Philip is so good. 

A girl approaches Philip’s set—Philip rushes up like an overprotective mom, and Lukas steps back, smiling. He looks at the other sets—the girl with the red hair looks like she’s focusing specifically on animals, but Lukas doesn’t know how she managed some of the shots she has, like the one underwater with the orange fish or the eagle high in the air. The guy with the glasses seems to focus on political movements, all kinds of photos in the middle of crowds, lots of signs and government buildings. The other girl, who seems really business-like and put together and not at all what Lukas would look for as a creative type, has the most artsy set of the bunch. Nothing looks real, like a fever dream, and she has a couple people with her she claims are in the photos, but Lukas can’t see them at all. The last one is a pretty blond girl who kinda looks like a fairy princess, and all her pictures all industrial, lots of hard lines on tall structures. Another mismatch, in Lukas’s mind, but he reminds himself that you can’t judge a book by its cover.

Art. He guesses it’s subjective as hell. He’s biased, though, and he doesn’t think he could ever view anything through the correct lens anymore at all. Philip. It’s all about Philip. Philip could trip and fall and Lukas would be simultaneously trying to catch him while thinking it’s the most graceful fall of all time. Even if it isn’t. Even if it’s ridiculous. He loves every little movement that Philip makes.

He watches some more people flock over to Philip and he feels pride bursting all over him. Sometimes, the old Lukas presents himself in his head, peeks around the darkness the new Lukas built up there, and marvels at the things ahead of him. 

_We actually get to hang out with him in public??_

_Oh yeah, buddy. We’re married to him._

_We’re **married** to him??_

_We’re actually technically marrying him twice—_

_Holy fuck. Dad’s okay with it? Everything? Us being gay?_

_Dad’s dealt with it. Figured it out. Had some help._

_But he’s not mean to Philip, right?_

_No. Dad loves Philip._

_…and we don’t…we don’t hurt Philip anymore, right?_

_No. We’re never gonna hurt Philip again._

“You okay?” Mr. Woods asks, suddenly beside him. “I know it’s weird sometimes, seeing yourself all large and in charge at one of these things.”

“Yeah,” Lukas says, laughing. “No, it’s fine—his work is incredible, thank you so much for picking him for this, he’s—well, it’s a really nice opportunity.” He looks off to the side when he hears a snap and he sees a few people with professional looking cameras taking pictures in Philip’s direction. He wonders if this will be in the paper or online somewhere. He’s gotta remember to look.

“He deserves it,” Mr. Woods says, settling his hands in his pockets. “He’s got immense talent and a very bright future, especially with a muse like you.”

Lukas laughs, already blushing. “Muse?”

Mr. Woods looks at him and laughs. “You’re definitely his muse. His inspiration. He let me in a little bit of your story, not too much, but enough to explain the gunshot wound—”

Lukas feels his stomach twist a little bit again, the reverberations of the past rattling through his head. 

“—and I really do think you two went through something that sharpened his eye when it came to you. Sharpened the love he felt for you. Sometimes artists see the person they love most in a particular way, and he’s translating the way he sees you into his work. It’s beautiful.”

Lukas is a little freaked out and he glances at Philip’s work again. It does sort of look ethereal, special, unreal. He doesn’t get it. He looks at Mr. Woods and finds him smiling. “I didn’t think we’d ever get this,” Lukas says, without thinking.

“Get what?” Mr. Woods asks, not unkindly. 

“You know, like…him…a happy ending…any of it,” Lukas says, and he doesn’t know why the hell he’s saying this to Philip’s teacher, of all fucking things. 

“Sometimes life can sneak up on you,” Mr. Woods says, in a way that says life might have snuck up on him, too. The girl with the really artsy pictures calls his name. “Well, enjoy yourself, Lukas—you should be really proud of him.”

“I am,” Lukas says, fast, even though Mr. Woods is already walking away. “I really—really am.” He clears his throat and looks down at his feet before looking back up again. Philip is laughing and in deep conversation in front of the picture of Lukas in the foils and Lukas shakes his head, trying not to smile. He watches him for a couple moments longer, enraptured by him. He takes a quick picture and sends it to their family group chat, which includes Philip, Dad, Sarah, Helen and Gabe. 

_Look at our boy working the crowd ;) already famous!_

He hears his own text tone go off a little ways away and he sees Philip look at the message and shake his head, beckoning him over. Lukas gets a little nervous thinking of talking to these people about how he fucking dyes his hair or what he thinks about having a snake around his shoulders, but he walks over because he can never deny Philip anything that’s within his power. He gets a slew of texts as he’s walking.

_Looks great!_   
_That’s our boy!_   
_He looks very happy :)_   
_Tell our kid we love him!_

“So how does it feel?” one of the girls asks him, as soon as he reaches Philip’s side. “Having someone take pictures of you all the time? They’re really good.”

“Ah,” Lukas says, laughing and looking down at Philip’s smiling face. “It’s fine because it’s him.”

_Are you gonna kiss him?_ Past Lukas asks, a hollow echo on the inside of Lukas’s skull. _In front of all these people? Aren’t you afraid of what they’ll think?_

Philip looks so fucking cute, gazing up at him like that, leaning into his space. He doesn’t seem nervous anymore, just full of pride and happiness.

Lukas kisses him. Kisses him and kisses him, feels the rumble of his laughter against his lips. 

Life really did sneak up on him, and left the gift of happiness at a frightened boy’s feet. Philip. A happy ending. 

Lukas counts down the days to their wedding in his head, and hears a slightly hopeful voice from the past behind all the numbers.

_I can’t wait to be you._

**Author's Note:**

> only two fics left, wedding and honeymoon. I expect them both to be very long, so bear with me. I hope all of you stick with me til the end <3


End file.
